So, in the spirit of WAATP shit look-a-likes, I stumbled upon a delightful feature film which I think sets the course for Jose Mourinho’s coaching career at Real Madrid. That film? Stanley Kubrick’s “The Shining.” So grab a bag of fresh popcorn, tuck your kiddos safely into bed, and get ready to be terribly amazed.
Ahhh vacation, when the neurotic micromanage time into tiny tidbits not long enough to melt 24 hours into eternity. The American vacation, not necessarily synonymous with occupation of a foreign nation, usually revolves around “to do lists”, “guidebooks”, and breakneck walking as we try to see the Eiffel tower, the Mesquite de Cordoba, and the [...]
Despite the parakeet, the octopus, and an assortment of other animals, only one entity can accurately predict the World Cup final: Slovenian philosopher and critical theorist Slavoj Zizek. We had a quaint chat with the man to wax Marxism, the Lacanian real, and Mark Von Bommel. What he had to say will probably only confuse [...]
The typical suspects have overcome group stage difficulties to rise to the top. However, no smoking gun has appeared to point out the single culprit most likely to win the tournament. Using a really big magnifying glass, a trench coat, a smart talking sidekick, and intuition, we embarked on an investigation of the remaining teams [...]
I went 11 for 16 on my last round of predictions (if you include the prediction I refused to put on paper: US wins the group, England comes in second…you’ll just have to trust me), which kind of sucks to be honest. But since I’m playing pundit, absolute past failure will have no impact on [...]
Just when you think that David Bowie has retired from the site, that the Goblin King will no longer grace our presence, that Jorge Luis Borges really is dead and not just waiting for a USMNT run to the finals, bam. It hits you. Despite the odd jokes, obscure historical references, and kinda weird pictures, [...]
So, in case you do not live in a cave with wax in your ears and a blindfold carefully tied over your eyes, Madrid has a bit of a big game. A reader reminded me that it has been ages since I last glanced into a magic ball via the assistance of David Bowie. Why? [...]
Ahem, European readers. Just as I click “all read” when you began to dabble about cricket, rugby, or the Scottish national team, I now give you fair warning – this is a rambling and incoherent essay on North American football culture. And by North America, I mean the United States of America. Well, maybe a [...]
For the life of me, I cannot decide if England is either “Andre the Giant” or “the Ultimate Warrior.” On the one hand, the shared language and culture parallels the eery kinetic bond between Hulk and the Warrior. However, on the other hand, some of the subtly condescending remarks bring to mind the disrespectful Giant. [...]
In feverish anticipation of the World Cup, we are going to take a moment and recall, relive, recycle, some of our favorite World Cup moments. These patterns constitute the fabric of the international game, these recurrences form the waves of the World Cup ocean. My personal favorite event is the inevitable question for Argentina upon [...]
