No, I am not referring to the pervasive US parties after Donovan’s spectacularly dramatic goal. Or the slight spike in internet traffic. No, I refer to a more personal stat for this site.

Here’s a brief glimpse into the multi-million dollar Futfanatico super secret traffic stats from yesterday.

As you can clearly see from these stats, and stats are always right, Americans hate Landon Donovan. They detest him. Why? Well, in case you missed it, immediately after scoring the game winning goal he dove like an Italian. Americans absolutely detest diving. Granted, no penalty kick was awarded and it was celebratory, but still, Americans disdain such theatrics.

Watch it here for good measure.

Which brings me to another point – Americans hate sports confusion. We don’t like to mix and mash our sports. Hence, most major professional sports leagues run in different seasons: American football for fall, baseball for summer, and basketball for spring. Donovan’s dive resembled a “slide into home plate”, a common play in baseball. We hate this.

Thus, Americans hate Donovan. But they are conscientious of him, just as NBA fans all hated Dennis Rodman and 90% of America hates the New York Yankees. This is a major step forward. We can only hope they hate him even more after this Saturday….

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