So last post we covered your love of young black male athletes. Kinda weird, but hey, to each their own. We also waxed hip swinging Latins and long running Anglos. Scratch that. We left out those full court pressing boys with the skin like snow. I apologize and accept your forgiveness.
And now things start to get a bit too offensive, a bit too, shall we say “sticking the hot poker in the cultural chasm which threatens to engulf the changing US population.” Ahem.
Sorry for the “ahem,” but I had to take a pause while the euro-snobs clicked “all read” on bloglines. Also, I am not a fan of the term “euro-snob” – can anyone who follows MLS really deny the difference in quality of play? While last post I said “US soccer reaches puberty,” I am such a geezer that I still think of MLS like a baby – it is my baby, it may be a bit ugly, but those are my eyebrows daggummit watch your mouth! The quality of play is not quite always there, but it’s so cute when they crawl…
But, ahem, I return to the topic at hand. My beef? The crazed notion in a certain soccer book on US soccer history which continuously refers to “St. Louis” as the “bastion of American soccer.” This book was written by a white man from the midwest who moved to England. NO IT IS NOT T.S. ELIOT. Silly goose! That was an entirely different animal, although if you’ve ever driven through East St. Louis “the Wasteland” does come to mind.
So yeah, soccer moms and a bunch of white guys running around and yelling “turn” when they finally manage to play a pass to feet is the “American game.” YOUR American game. Curse those “ethnic leagues.” Curse those “ethnic players.” Also, did I mention the crossing of the ball? Did I mention the heading of the ball? Sometimes when I see mid to lower level EPL games, I try to count the seconds when the ball is up and over the camera’s field of vision. But I can’t hold my breath that long. Nor do I really want to.
I cannot deny one thing – St. Louis has done a good job of carrying the soccer torch in America’s darker moments. Actually, that is a patent lie which underlays the lack of research in “ethnic leagues” by said “author.” People ask me – why can’t MLS field a team in Miami? Well, they kinda have a few Hispanic leagues that produce technical and savvy players (admittedly worse atheletes). And New York? Well, the failure to fully capitalize on the Hungarian Jewish Soccer movement comes to mind.
I will not rail on this “author” anymore because at least he cares about the game, even if he hides his anglo saxon focus under the smokescreen of white objectivity. I, though, am not about to hide my bias. In fact, I have not.
People point to “mismanagement” as the downfall of North American soccer. Yet there’s not even a footnote about ethnic leagues or the failure to incorporate them and their “ethnic players.” People complain about the quality of play in MLS and the need for money to attract progressively younger starlets from overseas, from Europe, that bastion of player talent which…pillages South America. I agree in that the US player pool needs variety. I just think we already have it, but have not untapped it. I think we have had it for decades. The problem is me. The problem is you.
To use a jarring metaphor – I think we need some jalapenos… in our coffee. Yes, not our Sonic cheddar bites, not our hamburger; that would be too easy. That’ s just a drop in the bucket. No, we need a hot pepper in our coffee. And offensively, in certain matches, at certain moments, the USMNT needs some subtlety and creativity.
Ideally, I want to see a midfielder who steadfastly refuses to run, calls himself “Pibe,” and looks at his teammates exasperated when they fail to tackle, recover the ball, and immediately pass it to him. This has already happened in MLS, by the way, but I want more! Of course, this type of player has another defense – we can use the 21st century linguistic song and dance of “effiency.” I want a player who is offensively “efficient”…even if he is defensively deficient.
I am not saying we should nationalize Riquelme….I am not saying we should nationalize Riquelme……I……am…..not……
But how do we get there? Should we fall into the WASP pressure soccer is part of “our” bloodline trap? Culture does play a part,when we want it to. A gross simplification via Italy. Ever since the Romans let Hanibal run himself tired, the waiting and springing spider approach has seeped into their genes. With success, mind you. The Italian attitude in oversimplified form: “The ball? Wait, you touch that thing? Oh, I only like to have about 5 touches a game, it kinda hurts the feet if your kick it. Or something like that.” I know – a team which does not chase the ball like two month old puppy! Bizarre.
Still, change takes time. Culture cannot be entirely over-analyzed by a third rate self anointed sociologist and cast aside. This is not some salt you can merely pour on Carthadge and whala, generations suffer. No, the opposite is needed – you must plant seeds and then…plant more seeds. And water. And wait. And water. And wait. And plant seeds.
But, mas alla de eso, how did you and I get here? This exact point, right now? And where do we go from here?
To be continued…
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