This weekend the Premiership proved it’s competitive equity with vengeful mid-table sides auditioning for “The Jedi Strike Back.” Meanwhile, across the channel, La Liga’s two horse race continued with a plodding Swede and light footed Argentine grabbing the spotlight.

Yes, a picture says a thousand words. But I really don’t have the energy to play with Picasa or write 1,000 words. Maybe characters, but not words. Instead, read this weekend recap and just make believe it meets my editor’s word count. That’s the beauty – I am my own editor. And I’m skating on thin ice.

In England…

I would say that Arsenal put a dent in Liverpool’s title chances, but my mathematically inclined copy editor has informed that the difference between a 1/1000th chance and 1/2000th chance is statistically insignificant. Thus, I will instead say that Arsenal deservedly beat Liverpool 2-1. The Scousers did take a 1-0 lead into the half, but Arsenal’s possession dominance turned the tide of the game early in the second. Once the Gunners gave up attempting to cross to a 5′8 out of position sole striker (Arshavin), and began playing the ball to feet, things fell into place.

At Old Trafford, Manchester United’s makeshift defense failed to keep a clean sheat against Aston Villa as Aglongconfusinglastname rose high to head home the game winner. More surprisingly, Michael Owen failed to a score a hat trick. Thus, a few major papers temporarily put on hold their “Owen Haunts Capello Nightmares” headlines. At least for the time being. He may score in a worthless midweek cup match, though. And props to these fine publications for saving the environment by recycling preposterous headlines.

At Stamford Bridge, Ricardo Carvahlo continued his renaissance for Chelsea as the Roberto Carlos of central defense. While supplying killer passes for the opening two Blues goals, he played no small part in all three Everton goals. Nobody in the isles wants to admit this fact, but Terry and Ricardo’s failure to handle a routine throw-in will keep Fabio Capello up at night more so than Owen’s occasional purple patch. But at least he’s a reliable penalty kick taker.

In Iberia…

The best kept secret in Madrid, aside from stealing your neighbor’s wireless, is Gonzalo Higuain. Despite riding the bench last season when Ramos cowered before Raul, the young Argentine led the merengues in goals. And this season? Pellegrini’s psychological torture of the once eternal siete threatens to overshadow the Pipita’s emergence from Raul’s shadow. But two goals away at Valencia should keep him in the pichichi chase, even if he has failed to warm over the cold hearts in Madrid.

Meanwhile, amidst the hullabaloo of the Catalan derby, Zlatan Ibrahimovic has quietly lived up to ridiculously high expectations. His job interview and description was pretty brutal – “So, basically we won everything last year and you will be replacing our most prolific goalscorer of the last decade.” Still, the Swede smashed home a penalty kick in the first half and Barcelona turn 70% possession into an extended and painful passing sequence. Painful for Espanyol, that is. And neutral spectators.

Related posts:

1. Sergio Ramos: Athlete, Celebrity, Role Model
2. The Real Real Madrid – Manuel’s Smoking Gun
3. Recap: Arsenal v. United – The Big Sleep